Bars, bars everywhere, but not a friend in sight…

I went on a date last week (don’t get excited everyone, as I’ve discovered, its quite easy to get a first date here but they are generally not followed up by a second date. He wasn’t special, as you’ll see, but dates are a good way for me to practice French, so at least he was useful!).

He didn’t know where to go and explained that the only way you “know” a bar or cafe here is to go to the same cafe/bar all the time. Which of course means its difficult to try different cafes. But then, building rapport with the locals so that they keep coming back is what keeps the thousands of bars and cafes in Paris open. Same with boulangeries, boucheries etc

In general, if a waiter doesnt know you, and you have an accent, then they’ll assume you’re a tourist. If you’re a tourist, you wont come back again and therefore there is no need for the waiter to give you good service, cut you fresh bread for your basket etc.

So in the end we ended up going to a cafe/bar that I like in Le Marais (my neighbourhood) called Au Petit Fer A Cheval.

[This is a link to the cutest blog! Look at the "about" and the comments. The cafe doesnt have its own website so use this site for some great pics:  http://pufflist.blogspot.com/2009/02/au-petit-fer-cheval-paris.html

Although they dont know me there, they are generally good to tourists and new people. I was a bit apprehensive about going because the previous Sunday afternoon it was full of English speakers and tourists - not exactly the best impression you want to give a real Frenchie when you're on a date.

I discovered the bar a few trips ago after reading (yet another) book about a guy who came to live in Paris. He raved about the ambience of the bar and the multiple boozy nights he had there. In all my visits, I'd never felt the atmosphere that he talked about. Well, as I discovered, Thursday evenings are nothing like Sunday afternoons!

Friends came straight from finishing work to meet for a drink, either standing on the footpath or crowding around the bar. At 7pm the waiter brought us a little plate of fresh warm potato tortilla pieces. The bookstore/cafe/bar directly across the road that I'd been warned was full of American tourists, was full of locals (this is a tiny cobbled street, so its quite easy to see across!). One guy stopped in at that bar for a drink first, then meandered over to Au Petit Fer to join some other friends at an outdoor table.

There was a fun, after-work vibe, with just a hint of danger: if you dont just have one and leave, it could turn out to be a massive night. [Note to Party Possee: It was just like an week-night evening at the Eddy].

Suddenly it all made sense. I got the familiar vibe of fun social activity. Except: I was on a date with a guy I’d just met, who was speaking so quickly in French I couldnt understand him, and which generally wasnt going so well.

Boom. Massive downer. I wanted so badly for a friend to turn up and share the great atmosphere with me. And not just once, every Thursday night.I wanted to meander to the bar across the road to see some other friends. I wanted to be able to just call someone up at 6pm and say “Fancy a kir at Au Petit Fer?” and we’d be sitting happily at our footpath table by 7pm.

Its such a tease! I’m living in Le Marais, the most awesome area in all of Paris, and I dont have anyone to share it with. I really started to miss my mid-morning or afternoon coffees with Dax in Surry Hills in my “holiday” period before I left Sydney.

I know I’ll make friends here. I even have confidence that I’ll make some French friends. But its going to be hard, hard work…..